Hello Pausers!

Im just gonna jump right in. I celebrated 2 years of sobriety on Mother’s Day. Does it get easier? In some ways yes. In others not so much. I say YES to waking every morning with a clear head, being present for my children, going to a doctor’s appointment (if you know you know), remembering my yesterday and just getting through life without the blinders on. I do miss the temporary escape from my overactive mind. Now I actually have to deal with depression, anxiety, menopause, LIFE! They say, practice mindfulness, find hobbies, increase cardio but let me tell you that nothing numbs the mind quite like that glass or 4 of wine! But I’m committed to reinventing my sober life.

For those of you on this path, what have you found helpful for recommitting to this lifestyle?

Second, perimenopause is kicking my ass. I definitely think its adding to my depression and anxiety. These last 4 months have been really rough. I went off estrogen, I went back on estrogen, I weaned off one SSRI and started another , took Xanax, daily, for a month (I’ll save that story for another time), weaned off of that, and started gabapentin for nerve pain and now trying to wean off of that. My poor brain has been put through the ringer. With all of these changes comes period of “brain” adjustment. My days are all over the place. I’m happy, I’m sad, I’m okay, I’m anxious and then I go to sleep to just wake up the next morning to Groundhogs Day!

All the while I keep asking myself, Am I going crazy??